Solution-Focused New Year’s Resolutions
We are all familiar with the experience of excitedly setting New Years Resolutions only to be disappointed when they don’t come true. Many of us avoid feelings of dejection by stopping resolutions altogether. A better way is to make sure you have the skills you need to attain your goals this year. Mastering resolutions is really a skill set derived from goal-setting skills. We can look to the experts on how to set goals effectively. Here is some information gleaned from years of studying the experts and helping people set goals:
1) Convert wishes, hopes and dreams into defined, specific, attainable goals.
2) Make sure to put your goals down in writing, using concrete, realistic language. Several studies have found that those who take the time to write down their goals greatly increase their chances of success. So seriously get out a pen and paper and start writing.
3) Create a recipe for success. This recipe is an action plan. Make sure the action plan involves small, specific, concrete steps. Write down steps like you might if you were writing down a recipe or giving yourself an instruction manual. The more detailed, specific steps you have, the better you’ll be able to get and stay on track.
4) Practice resiliency by preparing for setbacks. Recognize that change often occurs with two steps forward and one step backward. Ask yourself what can I learn from that setback so that I’ll be less likely to do that again? Then pick yourself up and keep moving.
5) Reward yourself along the way. Notice any sign of progress and give yourself credit for small steps as they occur.
Our psychologists at Orenstein Solutions would like to be a resource for you to help you reach your goals. Using a collaborative approach, we help you turn your dreams into concrete, practical goals by helping you explore your values, priorities, feelings, and needs. Then we work with you to develop an action plan, with concrete steps along the way, so that we can identify progress and setbacks, and make revisions as necessary. We will also coach you so you’ll have the necessary information, mindset and skills you need for success.
Some examples of our clients’ goals:
- develop a diet and exercise plan to lose weight and lower cholesterol
- become more organized and focused at work
- improve one’s social life and begin dating
- increase warmth and trust in one’s marriage; have more fun and intimacy together
- reduce anger outbursts and feelings of resentment
- improve parenting skills in order to better manage children’s behavior
Call (919) 428-2766 to schedule an appointment and begin attaining your goals. Maybe next new year, instead of writing down your resolution, you will be living it.